Things Are Getting Hairy

 OK.  Let's talk hair.

Back in April, Chicago mayor Lori Lightfoot defied her own orders and went to a salon to get her hair trimmed.  The Chicago Sun Times declared, "If the Mayor needed to get her hair done, then she needed to get it done!"

[Somewhere else.  Hard to believe Lightfoot paid anyone to make her look like that.]

Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi, not to be outdone (heh heh), visited her local salon this week too.

In person.

Unmasked.

Both of which are still not permitted in San Fransisco.

Called out on this (she was caught on the security tape), Nancy demanded an apology from the salon for "setting her up."

Oh, Nancy. Do we have to have this conversation again?

Fine.  Non-existent assistant, get me the Speaker on the phone.

Hi, Nancy.  Yeah, it's me again. It's about the whole salon thing. Don't give me that look, you knew this was coming.

Let's face a few facts, shall we?  You were the one who insisted on shutting down the whole damn country. Remember what you said? "I'm working to save the world from the deadly corona virus!" Stay inside, no non-essential services!

Now just between us girls, I feel your pain. No woman likes to walk around with that skunk-stripe of grey at the top of her scalp.  As many of us know, it's the chief reason why God created hats. You must have one or two. If not, give me a yodel, I can fix you up with a nice red baseball cap.

It's also why He created root spray.  The stuff you can get at any drugstore. (And no, it will do no good to say no spray can match your color. You're not a redhead like me, so forget it.)

As you know, I'm no Lightfoot fan. But Jeez Louise, woman! At least Lori didn't set her dogs on the salon owner! You haven't even called yours off yet!

And as to being "set up?" You know the old saying, "If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging?" Where are your spade-snatching staff when you need them?

Do the right thing, Nancy. Apologize for acting like a spoiled twelve-year-old.  Apologize for slandering the poor woman who owns the salon whose business you are presently destroying.

And buy yourself some root spray, like everyone else.

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