Election Night!

Last night was Election Night, and you know what that means-

Last-minute  watchparty guests!

6pm 

 Spouse:  I invited a couple of people over  to watch the results.

DIH:  What?  The house is a mess! Quick, help me clean up!

Spouse: Are you kidding? I have a cold. I'm too weak to clean up.

DIH:  #@#@$!!!

    [Kamikaze-style cleanup. Hide laundry. Stow everything else in daughter's room.]

7pm 

Spouse: We should have a little snack buffet, don't you think?

DIH: But we don't have anything in the house!

Spouse: Byerly's is open, isn't it?

DIH: @#@#$$!

    [Desperate run to high-end grocery store that sells fancy schmancy cheese and olives and the like. Blow $50 in the "gourmet" section. Race home.]

7:30

Spouse:  Do we have any paper plates?

DIH: #@##@$$!!!

    [Dig around in basement for the hors d'oeurvres plates I bought last Christmas. Stumble upstairs, wash and dry plates.]

DIH: Okay, all we have to do now is set up the cheese board--

Spouse: I already set up the cheese board !  See?

DIH; [examines cheese board. It actually looks pretty good. There's even a little sprig of rosemary on it. Just like in the magazines!] Wow- it looks nice!

Spouse (smiling):  See? I really know how to throw a party!

DIH: I need a drink.