Why Adult Edgeacayshun is Good For U
A few weeks ago I signed up for a screenwriting class. This was in order to force myself to rewrite a screenplay that I finished a year ago. I figured the goad of class assignments would get me moving again.
So now I have to read my next fifteen pages Thursday night. Which means I have to rewrite them this morning, because tomorrow is Halloween and I won't be home to write and Thursday is the class.
Yep. Motivation. I love it. Makes you get right down to work. Other writers might screw around with reading the paper or catching up on the blogosphere, or maybe even cleaning the house. But not me, boy. I get right down to business. Hit the ground running, that's my motto.
I like my motto. "Hit the ground running." Sounds like you've jumped out of a plane. Which if you decide to become a writer you pretty much have done, because what kind of idiot goes around jumping out of planes? I'll tell you what kind: the kind that decides becoming a writer is a really smart career move. The kind that wouldnt' listen to all those people who told her to go to law school or sell Avon or something, so she wouldnt' be throwing her life away--
But I digress.
About my screenplay. I think it needs a love interest. All movies need love interests. Even courtroom- drama- espionage ones like mine.
I hate love interests. Why do people have to go around screwing up perfectly good courtroom dramas with love interests? Yech. But they do help you do screenwriting-type things like reveal "motivation" and "character arcs" and s--t like that. I ought to know. I take screenwriting classes. Cost me a bundle, but hey, when I sell my screenplay that three hundred bucks will seem like a drop in the bucket, right?
I'll tell you one thing, when I sell my screenplay you won't catch me skiing at Aspen. I hear that's what your supposed to do, go skiing at Aspen and slam into Barbra Streisand on the slopes or something. The last thing I'd want to do is slam into Barbra Streisand on a slope. Let's not even contemplate that picture, it's too ugly. And loud. Very, very loud.
All right already. Back to the salt mines. I wonder who the patron saint of screenwriting is. I'd like a word or two with him/her. Like, today.
So now I have to read my next fifteen pages Thursday night. Which means I have to rewrite them this morning, because tomorrow is Halloween and I won't be home to write and Thursday is the class.
Yep. Motivation. I love it. Makes you get right down to work. Other writers might screw around with reading the paper or catching up on the blogosphere, or maybe even cleaning the house. But not me, boy. I get right down to business. Hit the ground running, that's my motto.
I like my motto. "Hit the ground running." Sounds like you've jumped out of a plane. Which if you decide to become a writer you pretty much have done, because what kind of idiot goes around jumping out of planes? I'll tell you what kind: the kind that decides becoming a writer is a really smart career move. The kind that wouldnt' listen to all those people who told her to go to law school or sell Avon or something, so she wouldnt' be throwing her life away--
But I digress.
About my screenplay. I think it needs a love interest. All movies need love interests. Even courtroom- drama- espionage ones like mine.
I hate love interests. Why do people have to go around screwing up perfectly good courtroom dramas with love interests? Yech. But they do help you do screenwriting-type things like reveal "motivation" and "character arcs" and s--t like that. I ought to know. I take screenwriting classes. Cost me a bundle, but hey, when I sell my screenplay that three hundred bucks will seem like a drop in the bucket, right?
I'll tell you one thing, when I sell my screenplay you won't catch me skiing at Aspen. I hear that's what your supposed to do, go skiing at Aspen and slam into Barbra Streisand on the slopes or something. The last thing I'd want to do is slam into Barbra Streisand on a slope. Let's not even contemplate that picture, it's too ugly. And loud. Very, very loud.
All right already. Back to the salt mines. I wonder who the patron saint of screenwriting is. I'd like a word or two with him/her. Like, today.
I vote for St. Jerome.....
ReplyDeleteThis has nothing to do with adult edjuhcashun, but as the husband of a wonderful woman who, through no fault of her own is 100% Irish, I just wanted to compliment the title of your blog.
ReplyDeleteWell, while I'm here, I might as well be useful. The patron saints of writers are St. Francis de Sales and St. Lucy. I guess that would work for screen writers. If Ricardo Montalban is dead already (not sure), you might want to try praying to him. The Fatima documentary he hosted is an absolute classic.